0.25 out of 100...

  I agree that there would be friends who are so close to each other. But I seriously doubt there would be someone like me and Sharon, who had ever shared the lowest mark in the history of Mathematics. Yes guys we scored freaking 0.25 out of 100. I still remember that evening, Murali sir was giving out the Maths answer sheets. He would be giving it from the top marks to the lowest. That reason was pretty enough for us to have fun. We were aware of the fact that our papers would be seeing the lights at last. Murali sir reached in 50s. But who cared. We were chit chating with girls and throwing paper balls at random friends. Sir reached in 30s. We didn't mind at all. Sharon took a mirror from somewhere[ a small one] and started reflecting the sun light on the pretiest girls in the class. He would be focusing the beam on a girl and would be narrating something on that particular girl. Like, 'see Sharath this girl is having the biggest boobs among the girls', That girl used to release bad gas during the class' and other funny comments [I still wonder how did this duffer know about the 'bad gas' scenario !]. I laughed at his joke and noted Murali Sir's 'Avante oru chiri' kind of stare at me.
Meanwhile Murali Sir reached in 20s. We were happily tearing the papers and making the balls and throwing at our friends. Fuck !! One guy has hit the Jack pot. He had scored 100 out of 100. One of our good friends. Meerej did it. I congratulated him. To me Meerej was just like someone who had reached on the top of the everest in a day. 100 out of 100 OHH God. Serious talent.
Finally Murali sir, started giving the papers of below 10marks. We were eager to be called. 7, 6., 5, 4, 3, 2, 1,
Fuck !! I pinched Sharon on his thighs. Sharon gave me a silly look with a funny smile. I liked it and started smiling at him. Then Murali sir called Sharon's name
Shaaaaaroooonnn : 0.25 out of 100

I laughed..Almost rolled on the floor and laughed.

Then he called my name.

Sharathhhh: I stood up and looked at the class as if I had scored full marks in the taughest maths examination of Cambride Unversity and Murali sir gave me the paper. I had a looked at it and started laughing more and more. we had same marks. Same freaking 0.25 out of 100.

Any how we managed to pass the +2 board mathematics examination. Just passed.

Now Sharon is in UK working with a company, That too in Olympics village. BHAGYAVAAAAN :)

I am with the New indian express.

Those school days, Especially Murali Sir's Maths classes were the most enjoyed sessions. Because. We didn't understand anything and we played around.

Anyway brother, Sharon Miss you man.. Love you big time. Hugs kisses...

The chennai FILTER COFFEE...

                           If you ask me whether Indian Premier League (IPL) has made any contribution to our National Cricket Team I would say, yes, but only a few contributions which could be calculated in less than five fingers. You might have enjoyed those massive sixes of Chris Gayle, Adam Gilchrist, Robin Uthappa, Sachin Tendulkar, Virendra Segwags of the world. You might have cheered when you saw the timber flying all over the ground in the bowling of Lasith Malinga, Lakshmipathi Balaji, Harbhajan Singhs of the world. But one question can you say by putting your right hand across your chest that, you have enjoyed watching this fast and furious format of the Cricket called ‘T20’. Former Indian cricketer Ravi Shastri is publicizing this format as if he had born while his mom was watching a T20 match. I am not writing this post to express my views on T20. I just want to express my takes on two players who have noted in short span by whole cricket world.

                          One among them is Mr. Ravichandran Aswin. I don’t know what made me his fan, whether his innocent look or the exclusive carom balls which are unplayable. To be very frank I am not a Chennai Super Kings (CSK) fan. But yet I watch all of their matches. Just to see this man bowling. One thing I liked about his captain Mahendra Singh Dhoni is that, he use Aswin in the power play overs where only two fielders are outside the 30 yard circle. Yet Aswin pick wickets at a very low economy rate. Aswin is the only bowler after Wasim Akram, who made me feel that, in every ball this guy is going to pick wicket. Aswin in his early days was a footballer. He used to hit the ball hard. But as I always say God had different plans for that footballer kid and he made his way to the Tamilnadu State Ranji Trophy team in no time. Aswin was picking wicket as though batsmen had no bat in their hand to defend his Off break / Carom balls. He confuses batsman with his simple yet very cool balling action. His ball would pitch where exactly batsman would find it difficult to choose a defense shot or an attacking shot to be played. And after pitching nobody in this world than Aswin know in which way it would turn. That is the skill of this ‘IPL discovery’. Remember what happened in Mohali while India was playing against Australians in World Cup Semi final 2011, When Shane Watson started picking Indian quickies; Dhoni threw the 10 over old new ball to Aswin. Aswin did what exactly his caption and 100 million Indians wanted. A ball pitched in half volley length turned exactly opposite to the brainwave of Shane Watson and stuck his pad. “Howzzzzzzaaaaatttt….”  Entire stadium roared, umpires’ index finger gone straight and looked at the sky. Watson found it difficult to believe. And India won the game.

                              Throughout the World cup Dhoni used Aswin as an opening bowler. You know in ODIs mandatory power play is for 10 overs which would extend to 15 if fielding team takes bowling power play in next 5 overs. Aswin had never disappointed his captain and always given some bonus in terms of early breakthroughs. Aswin is not only a bowler but alson a guy who is capable of using the long handle effectively. It is not always you would find Indian selectors choosing Aswin and Rahul Sharmas of the world over Harbhajan Singh. Aswin and Rahul were in the test and ODI squad of Indian team for the Westindies.  Cricket fans of across the world were waiting Sachin to hit his 100^th ton but had witnessed a tall guy who had batted in No. 7^th position in the batting order striking a magnificent hundred to save team India from a losing stage and  making them victorious. Aswin was among the pick of the wickets after that series. He bagged a handful 21 wickets which included a lot of front and middle order wesindians.

                              Aswin was the guy Team India looking for who could pick up wickets and capable of creating a twist in the game with both bat and ball. They got a bowler who deliver results and a batsman who is technically as strong as a middle order batsman who could save the team in any other bad situation.

                             Thanks IPL. Had not IPL find guys like Rahul and Aswin I would have stopped watching it long back. Thanks for this contribution. 

                              Sorry guys could not write about Rahul in this particular post. Space issues, you know? Next time it would be none other than Rahul Sharma.

Happy Reading :)

Thanks for your time

Sharath Muthirakkal

Jango's letter to the Top-Management: 10% truth and 90% drama...

Jango pk
Employee Num: 00000
Marketing Executive
------------- (Readers are welcome to fill in the blanks)
--------------(Readers are welcome to fill in the blanks)

The Deputy General Manager HRD
-------------
Head office

Respected Sir,
       I seek your permission in submitting the explanation, in reply to the notice No. 2333/to/2011 dated 12/12/2011.
      It is most respectfully submitted that(Drama), I hadn't been willfully absenting from duty unauthorisdly as alleged in the notice. I had planned for a pilgrimage to Sabarimala on fulfillment of a prayer made by my mother in terms of my MBA course, marking the termination of academic activities.The proposal of the program was informally conveyed to the respected Unit Cheif (Remember him HUH!!) as well as other colleagues. I was also observing penance as a prelude to the pilgrimage. This being my innigs journey to Sabarimala, I was required to undergo the ritual of seeking blessings of elderly persons from my meternal and peternal side, living scattered in various places, before leaving for the pilgrimage. Accordingly I had planned to take leave from 9/12/11 afternoonand leave for home. And from there to proceed to Sabarimala. Therefore I had presented the leave application before the Unit Cheif (Whom I wanted to make 10billion pieces and paste with fevicol and stuff there on the wall of central prison) and saught his permission to leave the office.
      Even though he had expressed his dislike in recommending the leave, I pleaded (Mega lie!
)that the program had been finilized in anticipation of sanction and I be allowed to proceed as proposed and complete the journey to Sabarimala. I had also placed the request before the respected (Undo?? Evide!! Winks!) General Manager over phone at the instance of the Unit Cheief ( Unit Cheif... Huh UNIT KOPPPP).
    I had completed the pilgrimage and returned home on 16/12/11 to recieve a notice from my college requiring me to participate in the convocation and passing out ceremony of Final ------- Students on 17/12/11. Participation in the function was stated mandatory (Wasn't it? Winks again). Accordingly I had attened the college on 17/12/11 from where I had recieved the notice under reference; Calling for explanation (Fishing Explanation!!).
It is most humbly submitted (Badayi of the year!) that, I had no intention of defying my superiors and to proceed on leave without authority. Being a new entrant in the company service, I am not well versed with the regulations in availing leave. I was under the impression that, the application for such an austere and auspicious ground will get assent on the part of the respectful authorities as a matter of routine. It is submitted that, I may kindly be excused if unknowingly I had created an impression of having absented from duty without authority. I seek your apology (At your face; PODA PULLEEE !!) sir in having cost the inconvenience.
      And in all humbleness (Badayi of the coming year !! ) request that I may be exempted from disciplinary proceedings. Allow me to reiterate that, such lapse will never occur in future. Anxiously waiting for your favors. ( OHHHHHH PINNEEEE !!! )

Jango KP




Thanks For your time
Sharath Muthirakkal

Jango in trouble - In the verge of losing his job...

           That very day Jango was truly excited. He was missing home for a long time and planned to take half day off to leave his home town by the afternoon train. He finished his daily routines in swift. Jango had to pack the whole room which is a total mess, inside two travel bags. He had done it too. Jango was about to lock the room. Fuck! He couldn’t find the lock and key which he kept on the table last night. He searched everywhere. Even in toilet. I don’t know you all are known to a proverb, Kuntham poyal, Kudathilum thappanam.. Poor Jango couldn’t find it anywhere. For the next 15 minutes Jango literally became a rat and ran every look end corner of the room. He had to go through the newspapers, waste papers, plastic covers which had been thrown all over. Finally he got the lock and key which was hanging against the wall and compressed against his bed. It didn’t take him too much to leave the place. Jango had his music on when he was in the bus and that song in ‘Spadikam’.. Ormakal… Ormakal.. was haunting him like anything.

                He reached his office on time. And felt the day so cool and fantastic. He knew that he had an appointment by 11’O’ Clock. And the place where he has to go to was just a stone throw away. Jango started reading a book and his manager came. You remember his manager eh?. That old man, who drink inside his cabin and spit all over the floor, Immediately the manager asked Jango , by what time is the appointment. He said by 11. His manager just murmured and left the scene. Jango wished he could hear his manager. When it was 10.40 his manager started literally barking at him for not going to meet the client. Jango tried to explain that the appointment  is by 11am. But all his efforts were in vein as his manager went on barking.  Jango didn’t mind it. Kurakkum patti kadikkilla ennanallo!!.  Who cares? He moved out immediately to the client’s place.

            He was there on time in client’s office on time. But the person he was supposed to meet went outside for some Poojas. Jango wondered why people do poojas by making someone wait. He told in the reception that he would meet the respective person in 40 minutes and left to his lodge. Jango wanted to wear his brand new woodlands shoes instead of the slippers he was wearing. Jango reached a traffic signal where he found out a straight bus which would take him to his lodge in 15 minutes. He ran like anything and almost reached the door. Fuck!! Green signal on! Jango jumped inside but the timing of his jump was wrong and he fell down on the road. No injurie!  Ishoye nee kaathu!!. But in a fraction of a second jango felt cool air brushing his inner thighs. He noticed some girls laughing at him. Jango looked at his united color of Benetton jeans. He couldn’t look at it again. It was torn. Like shit it was torn!!. Jango wanted to kill that bus driver, wanted squeeze that traffic operator who just in wrong time lit the green light, wanted to smack that sales man  in United color of Benetton showroom, who said him that the stitching of the jean is extra perfect. Like Sidin Vadukut wrote, Jango felt, as whole world slapped across his face and ran away laughing like Jagathi Sreekumar.

                     Jango had to catch up an auto to his lodge and he left the place after changing his dress and wearing woodlands. He headed to that client’s place only to find out that that person would be late for another 2 hours or so. Jango had a train leaving by 2.00pm, so he could not wait for that guy (Mother chood!) as it was almost 12.45pm. He rushed back to office and filled up the leave application form. Everything seemed to be fine till that moment except the ‘jean incident’. When he approached his manager, that bugger asked him to leave only on the next day. Jango couldn’t bear it. He wanted to place his manager’s head in that fax machine and fax it to the head office. He called the HR lady who had given him the posting letter and asked her what to do. She was an Aaaarthi pandaram !! She said she is going to have lunch. When some people get fire on their ass, somebody would be often there to laugh. Jango couldn’t wait. He called his General Manager to discuss the same. He said his GM that the unit manager is not giving him the permission to go home. Jango told him that he is a swamy and going Sabarimala on day after tomorrow. Then that bastard asked jango to leave office only in the evening and came back on day after tomorrow. Fucker might have thought Jango was planning to go sabarimala in Jet airways??

                        Then the manager asked Jango whether he has any interest to work with the same company. Jango said he didn’t say anything sort of that. Suddenly his GM asked him to resign and leave if he wants to take off for 3 days. By the time Jango lost his control and said his GM that, that particular company is not the last company for him and there are other companies across the world as well. He hung the call and chose to leave the messy place. His fellow worker also came along with Jango to have lunch. He advised Jango how to move a complaint, what should and should not be included, how the system works with the company etc. Jango felt as if his elder brother giving some valuable instructions. He loves that fellow so much. Jango finally left the place.

                   He may lose his job. But the last thing Jango wanted to happen would be working with the same manager. But Jango is still super cool. He knows what to do. He wants to teach that manager a lesson. If things are moving against his favor he would certainly resign from the company. Yet he loves the company and its culture. Only thing he hates is the work culture in his office and his manager’s dirty behavior. But Jango would miss that fellow worker, unbelievable, super cool brother.

                 This is not the end of the story. Later.. Later ;)

Thanks for your time.

Sharath Muthirakkal

Jango's workstation- Funny yet painful work experiences...

              Getting a campus placement was never in the wildest dreams of ‘Jango’, the main character in this story. He was in cloud 9 when he saw his photo along with other guys who got placed along with him in the college notice board. He tried pretending very cool. But Jango was jumping all over inside. He was excited even though he was not placed in Infoysis or kind or giants. He was truly happy even though he would get merely 11k in a month. After all jango was never thought himself crossing the line of MBA. But he had done it. He got placed in a well known Company which has got incorporated and grown inside Kerala itself. And Jango was truly excited, since the products of the company are super famous almost everywhere. Moreover he was excited to wear the tag of the company. He knew it would help him to get away from the Highway police. Jango would be one of the rare guys in Kerala who runs gearless scooter without license for more than 15 months, in an around 13000 kilometers, that too without being caught. No wonder why Highway police came into picture.

              Jango was initially asked to report in the head office of the company which was located in the next District. Jango and other new candidates had 9 days induction. Finally The D-Day came and they got posted in various branches. Jango’s friend got posted in Jango’s place. Jango received his order and ripped it open. Though Jango noticed a naughty smile on the HR lady’s face, he was not able to read anything out of it. Perhaps Jango was too busy opening the letter. Jango started reading. He felt whole the office spinning around him when he read the place where he got posted. It was 240 odd kilometers away. The place called ‘Golbadi’ in the neighborhood state.  Anyway Jango has decided to join on the given date.

                       Jango was on time there in the office. He was confused to see a flat with full of shattered products of the company he is going to work for. He thought it would be the dustiest place in India. Inviting high school students for excursion in such places would add to the popularity of the company. He met his manager, who was in his 50s and was at first sight looked decent and later on turned as real villain. Jango wondered even Keerikkadan jose would stand behind him. But his manager looked far better than Keerikkadan.

                      Second day at work Jango found out a terrible spelling mistake in the office. He found his manager spitting all over inside the office. Jango almost threw up. But hold it on and went outside immediately. When he discussed the same with his colleagues, he realized that they all are aware of it. One of the fellow employees even told him that, if the manager had got a chance he would shit all over the floor. Padachone pani palumo??  Jango couldn’t imagine it.

                            Jango found his co-worker washing his hand more than 5 times after coming back from his manager's cabin. Curious Jango enquired about it and ran out of office to laugh like hell. Jango stopped laughing only when a girl next door saw him laughing like an insane fellow. When he enquired about the hand washing incident, his co-worker said him that he had used the manager's computer and mouse for 5 minutes and never wanted to get admitted in the near by hospital.  'Adipoli.. adipoli...'

                             Third day was also eventful. When he entered the office it was stinking like hell. Jango sniffed as though a well trained police dog and found the smell. Alcohol!! That too low quality stuff. Huh, Jango was stunned again. On the same evening Jango was strolling back to his home and suddenly he remembered about the key which he kept on his table. He rushed back to the office. It was locked from inside. He knocked. Jango smelled something fishy inside. Manager opened the door and he found 2 half empty honey bee bottle and finished soda bottles along with pickles. His manager was not even able to stand properly. Jango couldn’t bear it and he literally ran out of the office. Had it be the Olympics 100 meter race, India would have got the Gold in the same event. Guess who would have been there in the history. Our jango.

                          It is not the end of the story. Lot to tell. Later... later ;)

Thanks for your time

Sharath Muthirakkal

Poonkavu Temple...

          Poonkavu temple is located in Edakkad which is 11 KMs away from Kannur District of kerala. It is one among the traditional ‘Kavus’ in Kerala where ‘Theyyam’ is conducted twice in a year. Poonkavu temple is literally inside a green natural tent. Huge baniyan trees and other identified and unidentified species of plants decorates the greenary.  Whole temple is separately divided in to three portion. The Back ‘Kavu’ is where the main God ‘GURUKKANMAR ‘ setteled and watch the proceeding of evryone which includes the naughty Goddess ‘PARADEVATHA’, all other deities and all devotees.

        Poonkavu Temple is famous not only because of the number of theyyams but also the rituals performed in a routine basis. Usually theyyam starts in the Malayalam month ‘Kumbham’ mostly February 16^th, 17^th and 18^th. It begins at the backside kavu. There in the backside, 4 Theyyams are there. ‘Elanguravan and Poothadi’, ‘Pambuthara’,’ Gurukkanmar’ and ‘Uchathira’. When the festival is on, entire village would be literally on. You would find positive energy everywhere. From the kids to the grant parents Theyyam in poonkavu means a lot. If it is toys and baloons motivates kids to hang out in the kavu, it is the search for peace, blessings in whatever endeavor motivates the other age groups. Guys like me had even prayed for not getting another 0.25 marks out of 100 in Mathematics.

        Gods and Godesses in Poonkavu temple had never let his or her devotees in a desert alone. Wherever they needed a push, It had been rightly provided.  Almost everybody in the village have to say some experience where they felt the presence of Gurukkanmar, Paradevatha and other Gods and Goddess in Poonkavu temple. I have been experiencing a lot of such. The approachability of the temple is famous not only in Edakkad but also everywhere. If you have a sorrow or kind of stuff, given you pay full concentration and belief, it would be washed away in shortest span of time. That is the power of the energy spreads in the territory.

         Al most all erespective of  religion, cast, creed comes here to offer prayers. All of a sudden you feel a sense of belonging. Rituals perfomed in the Kavu is believed to be years old and need to perform with zero defect. Otherwise, its believed that the personswho perfoms those would get adverse effect. Hence everything from the beginning to the end would be crystal clear.

          We all friends would be literally staying in the kavu for 2-3 days and equal nights, helping around, watching the proceedings and stuff like that. Nobody in the whole world would never dare to do anything against the temple. Many guys have tried to destroy, steal and other valuables from the kavu and failed miserably to do the same. Not only that, many of them had died in variety of accidents.

          Foreigners from UK, US etc. often visit the temple, when Theyyam is on. One Mr. Rozario from italy said “ We haven’t seen something like this before. This is energetic, Colorful and fantastic”.

          Last time I had my friend from Bangalore, Mr. Nikhilesh. He loved it like anything and he was telling me about the dark colors, richness and togetherness etc. Nikhilesh even told me that he would bring his friends next time.

         I invite all of you in the name of almighty for the Theyyam festival Which is gonna begin on February. For more information do mail me at : sharathmuthirakkal@gmail.com

 Thanks for your time.

Sharath Muthirakkal.

Another day in paradise...

   I know where heaven is. At least am fully aware where mine is. It is not that far. It is nothing but my sweet little home. There is a solid reason behind this post being published. That reason is simple. To me heaven is a place ultimate peace overtakes the sum total of all the material comforts of the whole world. It took me this many years to find out one such place. My heaven is my home, where, my parents, brother, grandmother share happiness and dilute sorrows of any kind.

    Usually I hate people advising me. Let it be elders or youngsters. The last thing I would ever prefer to hear in whole world could be a 10 minutes free speech with a tag hanging ‘advise’.

But Last night I found myself listening to my Dad for almost an hour. He was advising me generally, like how should I take responsibilities in my work life, social life and work life and how one should shape their life and all.

    He said me “Dear son, you make money or not, go out with your friends or not, you take up all your responsibilities or not, at the end of the day, you are coming home and throw yourself in the bed, feeling the presence of eternal peace, Calmness, Comfort and security; Then you realize that, even the luxurious 5* hotel would fail to compete with your home. In the first place who would come up to compete against heaven in case of luxury and comfort??

     To me, People with whom I am living are GODS. They are not just equal to Gods. They are actually. Your parents are one of them. Nobody else in the entire universe would stand with and for you in whatever situations than your parents.  Nobody else in the world would always offer a helping hand when you need it than your siblings. Nobody else in the whole world would teach you some lessons of generations and pure love than your grand parents. The bondage between them is so strong that, even if you stay away from them, you feel they are so near.

       They all are GODS and they all are living with you. Open your eyes. See and feel your home- The heaven in earth.

 

      ‘Title courtesy’: Phil Collins

Thanks for your time

Sharath Muthirakkal