I was desperate to contact Sidharth. All my efforts to find him on any
of the social networking sites such as Facebook, LinkedIn and even on orkut
failed miserably. He might have deleted his accounts temporarily, I thought. I
was that fool to leave my contact details to a person like Sidharth, hoping that
he would get back to me with his full story ASAP. Soon Sidharth and Rwitika
faded away from my memory. Hardly have we memorized dancers and supporting
casts of a movie which we had seen months ago. One fine morning during my
office hours I got a mail alert on my cell phone. And as always I dropped the
plan of checking the sender. Everyday hundreds of such mail alerts would come
if you have registered your profile on any of the online job search engines,
matrimonial sites or in worst case online dating sites!
After lunch I thought of signing in on to g-mail and chat with some
friends who would always be seen online! But that afternoon I could not even
look at the left side of my screen for those blinking green bulbs. My eyes were
glued onto an eight letter name ‘Sidharth’. Finally he has mailed me I thought.
But my happiness was short lived. It was just another mail without an
attachment.
His mail read; “Kishore, hope you are doing good. I am sorry that I
could not attach the word document that I have been writing since the day we
met for the last time at Café Coffee Day. It goes like this; Everyday, I would
finish writing before I go to bed thinking that the document is well set to be
sent. But the next morning when I reread what I had written till last night, I
always feel like “what all crap have I written”! This is what is really going
on. To be very frank I don’t know how to put black on white about what and who
is Rwitika to me? How close we were (At least I thought so) till she said…and
How much I miss and love her still. Dude, I don’t think words would ever
replace those feelings. You always feel to edit the stuff you have written
about your love and that process would never come to an end till you are
satisfied. But at the end of the day guys like me would always remained as
unsatisfied while explaining those feelings in words. I am sorry.”
His mail ended with the word which I often find girls using more than
thousand times a day; SORRY! I was sad
that Sidharth didn’t mail me with anything substantial but I was happy that at last
I had his email Id! After reading his mail I threw both my hands in the air disgusted
but pretended before my colleagues that I had an angry customer mail just
popped in my mailbox!
Thanks for your time
Sharath Muthirakkal
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